I have been contemplating Nature recently
and our relationship with her.
When I work with clients I work on the basis of a model I adapted from
Tim Galwey’s work and Chrissy Philp.
This model has four concentric circles with the individual in the
middle, the immediate environment around them and the background cultural
conversation around that. This is
then all encompassed by Nature.
What I am interested in doing is helping the individual understand their
own nature, the nature of the people they interact with, the nature of the
organization and society in which they operate and the nature of life
itself. I explain that the reason
for this is that we are much more effective when we work with the nature of things
rather than against it. Yet this
seems oddly against the grain of modern thinking. In the modern Cartesian world of “I think therefore I am.”,
nature and reality are there to be defined, created and controlled by man.
Looked at another way, it is possible to
see these concentric circles as being about personalities; our own personality,
the personalities of others we interact with, the personality of the
organisations or societies we are part of and the personality of life or nature
itself. This came home to me
strongly recently in coaching two people at one of my largest clients – an
international law firm. The first
was a new partner in his first year.
He was in a somewhat vulnerable position in that his path to partnership
had been forged by working very closely as the right-hand man to a very
successful partner but he was now tasked with building his own practice. His approach to this had initially been
to treat it as a task and set objectives for it. On this basis, he needed to go and target clients and decide
on the practice areas he wanted to focus on. Instead we took an approach based on the idea that he was
discovering the nature of his practice and the people he was going to work with
and that instead of worrying about all the things that he should be doing to
achieve his goal, he focused instead on dealing with the day to day challenges
that Life brought him and reflecting on the emerging insights in terms of the
relationships he attracted, the work that came his way and most importantly,
managing his fears that got in the way of this and caused him to push. For most of my clients this is
initially counter-intuitive since it is so much against the prevailing model of
seeking to impose our picture on the world and control it.
I have recently been reading Philip
Pulman’s reworking of Grimm’s fairytales.
In this nature is a key component.
This can be in the form of animals, trees, plants etc. The key is always in the patience
and character of the protagonists; it is a kind hearted act or morally upright
one which causes animals, trees, birds to help them. Those not in harmony with nature or who treat small
apparently insignificant aspects of nature cruelly or indifferently are always
repaid for their actions. These
days we would see such stories as naïve or rationalise them as having direct
causal impacts – ie. if you treat someone well they will be kindly disposed
towards you and might tell others etc.
We distrust the notion of anything beyond causality. Recently, I was coaching an aspiring
partner at a client who had been told that he needed to develop his ability to
win work to stand a chance of becoming a partner. Indeed, the pressure from senior partners above him was
intense in terms of being more “aggressive” in building relationships. He was very nervous about his ability
to do this and the need to compete with others. Like most before him, his fear was of ending up lacking
integrity in his relationships with others and finding himself making friends
with others simply for the purposes of winning work. He also could not imagine how to fit this in around the huge
volume of work he was already doing or where these people would come from. I realised that the main work I could
do was to reduce the pressure this mad approach was causing and to help him
examine the truth of this view of the world. When we examined how many client relationships people
actually had in the firm, it became clear that most, even the most successful,
only had a couple or even one main relationship. When I asked him to look at where this had come from the
answer was that it never seemed to be one that they had consciously cultivated
initially. To relieve the pressure
he was under, I suggested instead that he drop any focus on relationships and
instead just focus on the work he was doing and see what relationship naturally
developed without his conscious effort.
Within a couple of months, a friend of a friends in a social context
asked him about some of the work he was doing. This person turned out to be working in company that my
client had been targeting for many years without success and as result of his
conversation they were asked to pitch to go on to the panel of advisors for the
firm.
At our subsequent coaching session we
involved the senior partner who was sponsoring this individual. He adamantly put forward the view about
having to work hard on building relationships and being more aggressive in the
marketplace but when I began to carefully challenge him about this view and the
way relationships actually developed, he agreed that he was very uncomfortable
with it and it didn’t reflect his experience. Yet, when it came to talking about the opportunity that the
individual had just created, he went back to trying to describe it in terms of
a conscious and systematic effort which demonstrated the need to work hard at
cultivating relationships and turning one’s network into potential work
opportunities, even though it was clear that he did not really believe what he
was saying either.
Both these people were highly intelligent,
so how could they and most of the rest of the people I encounter subscribe to
such a distorted view? Do we
really want to create a world where we see each other only as objects to be
manipulated to achieve our own ends?
Yet, this is endemic in much of our current way of thinking. The natural sciences were originally
studied from the perspective of understanding nature and the nature of reality.
In a recent article entitled Dragon Kings
in the New Scientist the author was describing the work being done on extreme
events in systems, like the stock exchange or weather systems. They had called these sudden and
extreme events Dragon Kings to distinguish them from “Black Swans” (events
which happened infrequently but could not be predicted). These Dragon Kings were more frequent
but equally disruptive. Being able
to model them, meant that it might be possible to predict them and control and
prevent them. The article
concluded with the thought that controlling and preventing them was the point
of science.
In the past, our attitude towards Nature
has been that our role is to cultivate it, ie. to understand and work with it
in order bring out the best of it.
Instead our focus is on subduing and controlling nature to harness it to
achieving our own ends. In the
past, in fairy tales and stories, morality and nature were closely linked –
unnatural was a term for describing someone immoral and most evil characters in
fairytales were undermined or found out through the auspices of nature. Part of the issue seems to be that we no
longer have any awe for nature or her laws. The world is seen in terms of inanimate matter. Once we see nature as inanimate, it is
only a resource. Our conversation
reflects this, talking as we do about the Laws of Physics or Biology or Science
rather than the Laws of Nature or the Anima Mundi. I think our religions have failed us in this regard. Growing up as a Christian, I was always
troubled by the way that people around me would turn up at church on a Sunday,
be holy and “good” and then carry on in quite appalling ways during the week
having done their moral bit on Sundays.
They seemed to divorce spirituality and morality from their day to day
lives. Yet in many ways this was
understandable in that it was something we had collectively done.
What do I mean by this? What I mean is that we had made
religion and nature abstract concepts, connected to good and bad and also with
consequences that only applied outside the realm of nature. So, the enticement to good behaviour
arose out of the concept that you would go to Heaven if you behaved well and to
Hell if you behaved badly. These
moral inducements were entirely abstract and had no real basis in the day to
day reality of people’s lives. God
himself became divorced from nature and lived in some abstract world separate
from direct human experience. I
think this is pertinent to the debate over the climate. I am wondering whether the more violent
natural episodes we are experiencing in terms of extreme weather reflect our
repression of nature, that we are attempting to pave over the world, light the
nighttime, control and bend nature to our will and she is responding by
rebelling. This came home to me in a small way with my father when came to
visit us for Christmas and my next door neighbour. My father had brought wellingtons with him to wear when we
went for walks so that he could keep his other shoes and clothes clean. Yet, when we arrived back from our walk
my father was in a big condundrum because now his wellingtons had mud on them. He found it difficult to resolve his
dilemma or be able to let go of the fact they were now muddy, even though he
had brought them specifically for this eventuality. I will return to this after my neighbour as there is more to
this anecdote. My neighbour has spent
all the time we have known him fighting a constant battle with nature. He is by nature very fastidious and his
house and garden, like my father’s is kept to an extremely high standard. Yet, this is the source of difficulty
for him, because nature is forever intruding on his perfect environment no
matter how hard he tries to control it.
He has even gone to the length of buying coyote urine as a deterrent for
the deer that come over the garden wall and eat his roses. The very day after he told us that he
started to use this in his garden, my wife and I opened our bathroom window
which overlooks his garden to see a dear only yards away contentedly chewing
his flowers! We also installed a
cattle grid on our shared driveway to prevent the cows that roam freely from
our common damaging his garden, only for the cows in the field behind to push
down his garden wall and run riot on his garden. Even with the cattle grid, we are the only house in the
neighbourhood where the cows walk over our cattlegrid and still invade the
garden. It sounds like a tale from
Grimm about the man who wanted to keep his perfect garden and for me, it is
exactly that.
So, back to my father. My father has been suffering from a
severe depression for the last eighteen months. This has involved psychosis, delusions being committed to a
psychiatric unit and almost dying.
He has been given ECT, anti-depressants, anti-convulsive drugs etc.,
etc. I was discussing this with
friends over lunch one day, who described that their parents were similar and
the fight to keep them on the drugs to control the problem. “Why wouldn’t you take your medicine if
you knew it was making you better, I just don’t understand it?” one of them
asked. The other friend said it
was because they didn’t like the drugs, they said they made them feel
disconnected and drowsy as though they weren’t really alive. The discussion got me thinking about
depression and the fact that our definitions of depression. Most of our definitions of mental
illness and certainly of depression are that you do not conform to the current
norms within society. The doctors
who treated my father did so from the point of view of seeing someone ill. According to the current definition, he
was unnatural, there was something wrong with him. Yet, for me, I struggled with this. The reality for my father was that he
felt he could no longer cope with running a large house, the day to day demands
of the world overwhelmed him and he wanted out. Yet at the same time he was frightened of his desire to
leave, death terrified him, whilst at the same time, he did not see the point
of old age. His personality was
well and truly split apart. Yet,
the effect of the ECT and the anti-depressants was not to solve these issues –
they persist but simply to dampen down the level of agitation he displays about
them. With other friends who are
depressed I notice the same phenomenon, the anti-depressants and diagnosis of
illness rendered them unable to move forward in their situation, they felt
there must be something unnatural happening to them. How does this connect to nature? I think it is part of the difficulty we face in having
relegated nature to a material source.
It is like a teenager who sees Mum, not as a human being to be respected
but just as provider of material resources!
Where does this all leave us in terms of
Nature? I think the difficulty in
our current approach to the climate is that the rationalist viewpoint achieves
very little. We all know
rationally that smoking is “bad” for us, similarly we all know we should be
polite, respectful, kind etc. Yet
knowing these things rationally does not translate into change in our
attitude. It is like a toothless
religious inducement to be good or not be bad. They remain abstract concepts requiring conscious
effort. On the other hand, a
respect and awe for something monumentally powerful and intimately part of our
lives, produces a different response.
When we reconnect with the beauty, wonder and sheer aliveness of nature;
the integral relationship between matter and spirit, that life and
consciousness could not exist without matter and vice-versa then there is
balance in our approach. When we
separate them or relegate one aspect we are lost. I am an advocate of Science, an advocate of curiosity,
wonder and awe. I am not an
advocate of imposing our notions of nature and reality on nature and reality in
a fixed way.
Finally, I recognise that it is in the
nature of things for us to be dealing with the world this way currently, so in
that sense there is nothing to be done about it. We are learning just what we need to learn and who I am to
think it should be different? What
would I have to write and think and learn about and what clients would I have
to coach? As the Tao Te Ching
says, “Do you want to change the world?
I do not think it can be done, the world is already perfect.” Perhaps we are going to have to suffer
for our hubris; as the saying goes, “Pride comes before a fall” and if my
individual experience is anything to go by, leads to a fair bit of valuable
learning and a greater level of humility!
My own rational plan was that I was going to be spending my time this
week skiing, the forces of matter decreed that the nature of my experience
would actually be haemorrhoids which took skiing off the agenda. A literal pain in the backside but then
I would not have written this blog otherwise.
I think this way of looking at the world is
causing a huge amount of disease, but not the disease that most of us think.
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